As I sat in the chemo unit of the Cancer Center this morning waiting for a thyrogen shot so I can have another scan the end of the week, I was feeling both blessed and discouraged.
First let me say I am so thankful there are caring clinics such as the Ferguson Cancer Center in Freeport, but I don't belong there, right?
Every time I walk in the center which thankfully isn't often, it always feels surreal to me. I'm too healthy to be there, darn it!
For those of you who don't know, I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer in November 2006.
The Dr. says if a person has to have cancer, this is the cancer to have. It's very treatable and virtually curable.
This week is the third scan week I've been through since the inital surgery. This scan (hopefully my last) should be just a follow-up to make sure nothing new has shown up in the last year.
The scan week consists of
Monday - thyrogen shot (so I don't have to stop taking my thyroid supplement and revert back into thyroid hell)
Tuesday - a second thyrogen shot
Wednesday - radioactive iodine capsule (which they bring to me in a lead case wearing lead aprons none the less - a tad daunting - am I'm supposed to swallow that?!?)
Friday - Scan
It's a painless procedure other than the fact that I have to stay away from my grandbabies for a few days after the capsule. That's the worst part so I went and got my baby fix tonight.
The blessings and discouragements ...
There are places available such as the Ferguson Cancer Center - Blessing
I am in this center as a patient - Discouragement
The cancer I have is a "good" kind - Huge blessing
That my body is even capable of growing this stuff - Discouragement
My treatment was pretty quick and painless - Blessing
To see other patients coming in for chemotherapy, knowing each other as well as the nurses on a first name basis - Discouragement/Blessing
My blessings far outweigh any discouragements and I thank God for that every day.
But still, this week is a very weird place for me to be.