Update time

Two weeks ago, I was able to transition from this ...

to this.  Progress!

Although, I was directed to not put any weight on it yet.  Until today!  Technically, I cheated and started yesterday a bit.  There is some pain involved but nothing like I was told to expect.  Honestly, my knee is probably more sore than my foot and ankle from kneeling and bearing my weight on the scooter these past 8 weeks.  

Instructions were to only put 25% of my total weight on it for 5 days, then 50%, then 75%, etc.  The worst part of all of that is it means I have to go back to using crutches which seem incredibly awkward to me.  I'm hoping I'll get a smoother hang of them the more I use them.

I also started back to work last week.  I've been working half days in the office and half days from home.  It's been going well and it feels good to be getting back into my "normal" routine.  However, it's kicking my tail and when I come home I feel like doing this

 instead of the work I should be doing from home but I've been pushing through and glad I did.  It's all progress for which I am thankful. :)

Learning How To Receive

All too often, when someone offers help, don't we say - thanks but we'll be fine, we can get by, we got it covered?  Maybe you don't but I sure do. 

Throughout the recovery period I'm in, people have offered to drive me places, stop at the store to pick something up, let us use their larger vehicle so I would have more room to stretch out and bring us meals and more meals and more meals.  My inclination is to say "Thanks, but I've got this."  In fact, I have to fight really hard against saying just that.  When I struggle with this, I am reminded of a conversation I had with our Alabama pastor friend.  As I was declining his help, he reprimanded me "Don't y'all steal my blessing".   That conversation has stuck with me these past few years as I have made a conscious effort to try and I do mean try to not decline assistance so quickly.  When we decline others help, we really are stealing their blessing to us.  Oh, they might be offering help because they feel they have to for whatever reason but I believe most people offer help out of love and genuine care for the other person.  When we say no, it devalues them and their gift to us.  It doesn't allow them to love on us as they wanted to.  It doesn't allow them to bless us.

For instance,

If I had said no to our small group leader when she wanted to set up a schedule for people to bring meals while I'm laid up, we likely wouldn't have incredible food like this...














Doesn't this salad look amazing?  And it tasted as good as it looked!  The meals people have brought have been incredible! 

If I'd have said no to my daughter in law, Heidi, when she offered to drive 15 miles both ways to pick me up for Ella's preschool program, I would've missed out on spending time with Heidi, a nice picnic lunch in the park on a gorgeous day and the opportunity to see Miss E. in her program.

Our little cutie is the second from the right.  So glad I accepted and went along.

So, the next time someone offers to help you, take a chance and say yes.  By not stealing their blessing, you just might feel blessed, loved and cared for in the process.

Perspective

Last Thursday I had to head back to the doctor due to extreme pins and needles(nerve) pain in my ankle.  They wanted to make sure the cast was fitting correctly and there wasn't an infection or something else going on.  Fortunately, it wasn't anything serious.  They were able to pad a new cast differently and give me a different medication that will help with nerve pain.

As we were sitting in the waiting room waiting to be called back, a woman and her husband sat down across from us.  The woman looked to be in her upper 30's and physically fit.  She was sitting in a wheel chair because her one leg was missing just below the knee.  As we sat and waited, we couldn't help but overhear bits of their conversation.  As they were talking, she was extremely positive and upbeat. 

Then she struck up a conversation with me asking how much longer I needed to have my cast on.  I told her with any luck I would get a walking boot on June 16.  Her response was "Casts are the worst thing.  Granted it's annoying to have my leg cut off but casts are worse!"  

Ok, so let's back up the conversation...she said it was "annoying" to have her leg permanently cut off but a temporary cast was worse?!?  Now that's some positive perspective!

For the first time in my life I didn't want to be called back to a room right away.  I really wanted to continue our conversation and hear more of her story but as luck would have it, I did get called right after that statement.

Her one statement has impacted me greatly.  I will probably never run into this woman again but what she said and her positive attitude will stick with me forever.

It really is all about perspective isn't it?  We get so wrapped up in what's going on with us that we forget there are others out there who are struggling as well and have much bigger challenges to deal with.

I am committed to keep things in perspective.  Yes, there has been pain and yes, I've had to humble myself and ask for help and yes, my dirty house is starting to get to me but this is all temporary.  In a few short months, I should be back to normal and going full speed ahead again while others have longer term issues to deal with.  So, for now, I will keep things in perspective.

Just look away....another lesson in the learning

I typically try to "git r done" so not being able to do that has been a slightly frustrating challenging.  I have had to learn the tolerance of not everything being clean and in it's place.  I don't have a spotless house by any means but I do like things picked up and in their place without a bunch of clutter.  I don't work well in clutter, nuff said.  DH has done a wonderful job of keeping the house up as he is able, keeping things in my line of sight from the recliner tidy and the cupboard doors shut. Oi!  Does that bother anyone else?  A cupboard door left hanging open?  Oh my, but that's a topic for another post someday on the OCD qualities that have taken up residence in my brain. 

I am now 3-1/2 weeks post surgery(yea!) and 4 weeks since the last time my house was really cleaned.  

It's.driving.me.crazy!  

In the grand scheme of things it's probably not so bad.  In fact, we've looked at homes for sale that were much dirtier than ours but everyone has a specific level of tolerance until things drive them batty, right?  For instance, from where I am sitting, I can see dust on areas of our hardwood floor and on the furniture.  Small potatoes, right?  I was also just out sitting on our front porch and of course, I noticed(cuz that's how I'm wired)  how dirty the porch was and how badly it needs sweeping.  Again extremely high on the importance scale?  Not at all but sometimes it's those little things. 

All this to say, I have had to learn to tolerate some things that quite honestly really aren't all that important in the grand scheme of life.  I've had to just look away and realize my and DH's limitations.  Quite honestly (and sure in retrospect), I think it's been good for me to go through this and really focus on what's important and not on what isn't done.  My list doesn't need every box to be checked each day.  So for now, I am putting it in perspective(a topic for another post), and choosing to erase the "in" and am practicing tolerance. :)